Staying Strong
by Irishlove4Snape
Summary: When Hotch is faced with telling Penelope the truth about things left unsaid in the season 6 finale he gets more than he bargained for.
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: I don't own Criminal Minds and I'm not making any profit off of this story. **

**Summary: When Hotch is faced with telling Penelope the truth about things left unsaid in the season 6 finale he gets more than he bargained for. **

**Begins at the end of the sixth finale and continues into the seventh season, with just a few changes. **

**Please R&R**

**Hope you Enjoy! **

…

Penelope turned her keys over and over again in her hand absentmindedly as she walked to her car. She was deep in thought, reflecting on the past few days.

She knew there was something up with her Unit Chief Aaron Hotchner, but she just couldn't pin point what it was.

She was worried for her team, even if the others didn't seem minded by Hotch's weird behavior.

So much had happened in the last year, first JJ leaving and then Emily dying, Penelope didn't think she could take anymore change.

"Damn it!" she heard someone swear a few feet from where she was standing; her head snapped up in the direction it had come from, she knew that voice.

Quickening her step Penelope made her way to a large black SUV that was parked just a few spots down from her own car.

There she found Hotch, leaning against the SUV with his head in his hands.

"Hotch?" Penelope asked tentatively.

There was slight stiffening in his posture, but other than that there were no signs to tell he had been startled by her voice.

His hands fell to his sides and he looked up at her "Garcia," he acknowledged "I would have thought you had left with the rest of the team to get dinner?"

Penelope shook her head "I wasn't hungry," she lied.

She could tell he was profiling her and probably knew she was lying, so she quickly asked "What about you? I thought you had left almost two hours ago?"

"I got held up," he explained "Strauss stopped me and said she wanted to talk before I could leave the building."

Penelope wrinkled her nose at the idea. She wouldn't want to spend a Friday evening with the Dragon Lady, especially after finishing up a long case. However she didn't dare say that.

"Then when I finally got down here I found that my engine," Hotch patted the hood of the SUV to emphasize his point "wouldn't start. So now I'm stuck here until Triple A comes."

Penelope bit her lip, not knowing what else to say she pathetically responded with a "That sucks."

Hotch raised an eyebrow, his look seeming to say 'That's the understatement of the year.'

"Well I'll wait with you if you want?" Penelope offered.

Hotch hesitated for a moment before saying "It's okay Garcia, it's late, you should get home."

Penelope wondered about his hesitation, did he think she didn't want to stay with him even though she had offered, it had seemed to her like he was about to tell her that he'd like her to stay until he had changed his mind at the last minute for some unknown reason.

She really didn't mind, she liked hanging out with Hotch especially when work wasn't involved and you'd sometimes get the chance to see one of his rare smiles. Plus anything was better than going home to her empty apartment on a Friday evening.

"Really I don't mind," she said with a bright smile "and who knows when Triple A is going to get here, do you really want to wait alone?"

Hotch didn't answer her, he just sighed and leaned back against his car again, Penelope took that as a no since he hadn't told her to leave.

"Well," Penelope began, a thought coming to her "since you're stuck here anyways…and since it is technically later, maybe it would be a good time to talk about…."

"How did I know you were going to ask that?" Hotch said cutting her off, he sighed as he thought about earlier that day when he told Garcia he would talk to her about the changes that were happening at a later time.

"Well being a profiler probably helped" Penelope said.

Hotch couldn't help but chuckle.

"There's really not much to say" he continued.

Penelope shook her head "Don't give me that, I know something's up, you've been acting strange all month."

"Now who's the profiler?"

"Hotch." Penelope warned, not allowing him to change the subject, she wanted answers.

Hotch rubbed a hand over his face.

"You know I'm just going to continue asking until you tell me, so you should just save yourself some trouble and tell me now" Penelope reasoned.

She did have a point. Hotch knew that was the truth but he also knew Penelope wasn't going to like what he had to say one bit. Now he was just weighing which one would be worse.

He decided that he would have to tell her at some point, so he better just get it over with.

"The directors have told me that they are planning on downsizing the team because of budget cuts. They want me to lead an investigative task force," Hotch said, bracing himself for her reaction.

As he expected Penelope's eyes widened dramatically and then she shook her head fervently. "No!" she said firmly "They can't…they can't just take you away. We're a team, a family. Please tell me you're going to fight them; we just can't lose you too!"

Penelope looked like she was going to cry and Hotch felt bad, he hated seeing the always smiling tech unhappy.

"Actually…" Hotch began, knowing fully that this would hurt her more than anything but it couldn't be avoided "I think it's the best for the team, if I leave most of the pressure will be taken off the rest of you and I already know I'll be leaving the team in good hands. Morgan has already proved that he can lead this team."

Penelope gaped at him for a moment and then the tidal wave of her emotions assaulted him. "Are you out of your fricken mind?" she asked boldly "We're a family, whatever gets thrown at us we can handle it as long as we are together! We would fall apart without you. You can't leave…"

Hotch watched her as she ranted and almost groaned out loud. Her face was flushed, her cherry red lips moving a mile a minute, her body practically shaking with the injustice of the situation, leaving her breathless.

Even in her anger Penelope was beautiful and his restraint was waning.

Without thinking Hotch stepped forward, leaned down and captured Penelope's lips, shutting her up effectively.

Penelope gasped and stiffened.

Realizing what he had done, Hotch pulled away quickly and studied her face.

Penelope needed a minute to comprehend what had just happened.

She couldn't believe it.

Her Boss, Aaron Hotchner, a man she had had a secret crush on for the past seven years, had just kissed her.

Her! On the lips!

Her, the geeky, witty but far from beautiful technical analyst who couldn't possibly have a shot with him.

Hotch took her silence as rejection.

He shook his head "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have done that."

Penelope looked up and her eyes locked with Hotch's.

He looked desperate.

"Don't you see?" he said turning away from Penelope "this is why I have to leave."

"Because of me?" Penelope asked incredulously, finally finding her voice.

Hotch shifted uncomfortably "Listen Garcia, I shouldn't…"

"No," Penelope interrupted him "are you planning to leave the BAU because of me?"

Hotch was now extremely uncomfortable, why did he have to go and kiss her?! "Not because of you, because of my…attraction to you."

Even though he had kissed her not five minutes before, it was still weird for her to hear him admit it out loud and again she stared at him blankly.

Hotch ran a hand through his hair "But of course nothing could ever happen between us. For one thing you're with Lynch…and god, I just kissed you, I'm such an ass."

"Actually I'm not" Penelope said.

"What?" Hotch asked turning around and looking her in the eye, he had previously been staring at his hands in guilt.

"Kevin and I broke up three weeks ago" Penelope explained.

Hotch was shocked "Why?" Then he frowned, he was being rather insensitive, but before he could tell her she didn't have to answer that she went on.

"We wanted different things," Penelope said and since Hotch looked confused she added "he wanted me to move with him to a farm because he argued that my job was too stressful…even that I was too jumpy." Penelope made a face and muttered "Though I'm sure most people would be jumpy if someone tended to sneak up on them all the time…"

"A farm?" Hotch repeated still trying to grasp what she was saying.

"Uh yeah, a farm with fluffy sheep, chickens, a big old barn and probably no internet connection" Penelope glowered at the thought.

"There were just some things that Kevin couldn't understand. First of all, I Penelope Garcia, do not do the country thing, I never have and I never will. Secondly, and most importantly, I could never leave the BAU, no matter how stressful some days are. You guys are my family and I wouldn't give that up for anything."

"So Kevin told me he had enough, said he was tired of being chosen second over my job and I don't blame him, I always put the team before him and he just couldn't live with that."

Hotch wanted to offer some form of comfort to her but he didn't know what to say. Her situation sounded exactly like his had when Haley had asked him for a divorce, but he guessed many people with jobs like theirs ended up in the same situations.

"I'm sorry to hear that" he finally said.

Penelope chuckled "First you're kissing me and now you're telling me that you're sorry to hear I broke up with my boyfriend?"

Hotch actually blushed to Penelope's surprise.

"Well…" Hotch said trying to keep his cool "as I said before I shouldn't have done that."

"Why?" Penelope asked "Other than Kevin that is."

Hotch just stared at her for a moment, wondering if she had actually just asked him that "…Because it's against the rules, fraternization policy and all."

Penelope couldn't help but roll her eyes "You think with all the stuff our team has gotten away with in the past that Strauss would come down on you because of the fraternization policy?"

Hotch was surprised by Penelope's attitude towards the rules, if he remembered correctly she had been quite fearful of her relationship with Lynch becoming public due to those same rules when she had started dating him, but he guessed a lot of things had changed since then.

"Best not to push our luck," Hotch finally said "and besides it wouldn't matter since you're obviously not interested."

Penelope raised a brow at that "Who said I wasn't interested?"

Hotch froze where he was standing "…The way you reacted, you tensed up…I just assumed."

"Well you assumed wrong," Penelope said mater-of-factly "I was just surprised. Truthfully I've had a major crush on you since…the first time I saw you smile."

Penelope blushed, thinking she had revealed too much.

Hotch swallowed "It…it would still be wrong."

"Who says?" Penelope asked, now that she knew she had a chance with Hotch she was not going to just let him walk away.

She took a few steps towards him.

He took a deep, shuddering breath when she was standing less than an inch from him. She leaned up, angling her face towards him and planted her lips firmly against his.

Their mouths moved together and then the Alpha male in Hotch took over. He pushed Penelope up against the side of his SUV and practically attacked her mouth in his vigor. He ran his tongue over her bottom lip causing her to part her lips and his tongue to slip inside.

He cupped Penelope's face as he kissed her, then his hands moved down to explore her body. He pushed one of his legs between hers and Penelope nearly fainted.

Penelope moaned as she ran her hands through Hotch's hair "Oh Aaron…" fell from her lips when his mouth moved from hers down her neck, leaving a hot trail of kisses.

Penelope felt like she was on fire, she pushed herself more firmly against Hotch's body as his hands began to slip under her shirt. Caressing her stomach as his hands moved slowly upwards.

Then they heard the screech of tires coming down the ramp of the parking garage and jumped away from each other, both of them breathing heavily.

"I bet that's Triple A," Hotch said as he tried to straighten his suit, really the parking garage of the FBI was not the best make out place.

Penelope was trying to smooth her own wrinkled clothes and brush down her mused hair.

Before Hotch could say anything else, the tow truck pulled up and two men got out, greeting him as they went to take a look at his SUV.

Hotch shot Penelope a look, he wanted to talk to her but now was not the right place.

However he didn't need to worry, Penelope wasn't going anywhere.


	2. Chapter 2

**Don't Own. **

**Please R&R **

**Enjoy! **

…

Penelope was standing at the back of the SUV as she listened to what the guys from Triple A had to say.

She was still somewhat flustered from earlier.

Hotch was hovering near the front of the SUV watching closely to what they were doing.

Every once in a while he would glance over at Penelope and she would feel her cheeks flush if she was caught looking back.

"Your battery is corroded, you'll need to take it to a mechanic to get it replaced" one of the men, who had introduced himself as Tom, said.

"Damn," Hotch swore "I was hoping it would be something that could be fixed on the spot."

"Sorry Sir," Tom said "but there's no way around it, your SUV needs a new battery before it will be safe to drive again."

"No, no I completely understand, I was hoping for a quick fix but safety is definitely more important." Hotch replied.

"Okay well we can tow your SUV to your mechanic but they won't be open until tomorrow, so the best we can do is leave it on the lot" Tom said.

"Okay," Hotch agreed "sounds good, thank you."

Tom nodded and signaled for his coworker Ralph to hook up the SUV.

"Do you need a ride somewhere Sir?" Tom asked.

Penelope who had been silent up until then took that as her cue to jump in "I can give you a ride Hotch, after all, your place is on my way."

"Alright, as long as you're sure you don't mind" Hotch said.

"Of course not," Penelope said with a smile "after all our conversation from earlier wasn't nearly over."

Hotch gave a slight nod before he walked over to Tom to sign some papers stating that he authorized them to take his vehicle before he left with Penelope.

When he was finished he and Penelope walked to where Esther was parked. Hotch shook his head as he sat down in the orange convertible Cadillac, he had never before driven in Penelope's car before and he thought the Cadillac was a little impractical, but yet he acknowledged that it suited her perfectly.

As they drove an awkward silence settled over them as Hotch tried to decide how to broach the subject of what had happened earlier. It was hard for him to admit but he was nervous.

"I don't regret it."

Hotch was surprised, he hadn't thought she'd be the first to break the silence.

He looked over at her.

Keeping her eyes on the road she said honestly "I don't."

Hotch watched as her fingers tapped on the steering wheel and could tell that she was nervous too.

Penelope bit her lip before stating "I want the chance to be happy and I could see myself being happy with you."

Hotch could tell by the way that she was focusing on the road and avoiding his gaze that this was really hard for her.

To admit her feeling to him was a big risk for her, she was opening herself up even though she was scared of his rejection she was obviously willing to take a chance, if somewhat reluctantly.

"I don't regret it either," he said surprising both of them. That was not what he had been planning to say.

He had been trying to figure out a way of letting her down gently. It wasn't that he didn't want it too, he obviously did, but he didn't want to chance ruining anything between them.

However he knew that if he rejected her now, after she had told him her feelings that he would definitely be ruining their friendship.

Penelope may seem like a strong, confident, unbreakable woman on the outside but she was vulnerable when it came to relationships and her self-confidence.

He didn't want to fracture that. He was doomed from the moment he had kissed her.

Penelope pulled to a stop "Well here you are."

Hotch placed his hand on the door handle but stopped from getting out, he turned back to look at Penelope.

"Would you…like to come in?" he asked.

Penelope looked past him, up at his apartment "Jack isn't home?"

"He's at Jessica's until tomorrow" Hotch answered.

"Well, I don't want to impose" Penelope said biting her lip again.

"You wouldn't be," Hotch insisted.

"Okay," Penelope nodded, turning off Esther.

As soon as they got inside their gazes locked and a heated silence settled between them.

Hotch took a step closer to her clearing his throat "You know we wouldn't be able to tell anyone."

"Including the team?" she asked.

"I don't know how the team would take it but it's probably best we keep it to ourselves, at least until we know what _this _is," he said gesturing between them.

"And if it will work out?" Penelope suggested.

"Yeah…"

Penelope nodded and then closed the distance between them.

Hotch reached out and gently caressed her cheek "Penelope, this could change everything."

God she loved the way he said her name. She leaned into his touch "I know, but we have to give it a try, don't we?"

"I'm afraid that I'd live to regret it if we didn't," he said as he backed her up against the wall, his eyes locked onto hers in a heated stare before his lips descended upon hers.

She had her answer.

His kiss was slow and tender unlike the frenzied grouping in the parking garage, this was passionate. His lips caressed hers slowly, nipping gently, asking for entrance.

His hands came up and tangled in her hair. She moaned and his tongue snaked into her open mouth. Licking and sucking their tongues danced together.

Her fingers fumbled as they tried to loosen his neck tie. She needed more of him, wanted to feel his skin against hers.

Hotch pulled away from the kiss. His hands landed on hers and pulled them away. He wanted to go slow; he wanted it to mean something.

He kissed her palm before leaning into her and placing a kiss against her neck. He licked a long path from her throat to her ear making her shudder.

"Relax," he whispered, biting gently on her earlobe and electing a moan "we have all night."

Penelope whimpered.

Hotch's mouth moved back to her lips, nipping her bottom lip softly then running his tongue across it soothingly. He raised his hands to his necktie and then with sure, stable fingers he pulled it off and let it drop to the floor. He slowly removed his jacket before he began unbuttoning his dress shirt.

Penelope watched him hungrily, her fingers itching to reach out and touch him.

As he reached the last button and popped it open his shirt slid apart to reveal his muscled chest, he locked eyes with her and smirked.

Penelope couldn't take just standing there anymore, she had to touch him. She reached forward and ran her fingers through the light dusting of fine black hair that littered his torso.

Her fingers flicked over a nipple causing him to groan and they made their way down his chest. Penelope just loved the feel of the hardness beneath her hand. Slipping her hands up over his shoulders she pushed his shirt off and leaned forward to place a kiss on his shoulder.

Hotch took in a sharp breath at the feeling of her soft lips running over his skin.

He reached out and started to undo the buttons of her blouse. She pulled back from him as he slipped her blouse off. His mouth practically watered as he took in her ample breasts covered in a lacy purple bra.

He cupped each breast in his hands before reaching around her to undo the clasp. Her bra fell to the floor and Hotch stepped forward so that he was flush against her. He bowed his head and ran his tongue over one of her breasts. Circling her nipple with his tongue he sucked it into his mouth.

Penelope moaned.

Not to neglect the other one, his hand found it and gently pinched it between his thumb and forefinger. He grinned against her breast as he felt Penelope shudder.

Then with a final lick he continued downwards, kissing down her abdomen as he went.

He found the zip on her skirt easily enough and pulled it down. Her skirt slipped to the floor and he encouraged her to step out.

He kneeled before her and gazed at her matching purple lacy panties. He licked his lips as he placed his hands on her hips. Slipping his fingers into her panties he pulled them down her thighs and to her feet where she kicked them away.

Penelope was breathing heavily now as Hotch gazed at his prize. He moved forward, inhaling her scent he brought a single finger and ran it between her neatly trimmed lips.

Penelope's breath hitched.

Hotch grinned.

His other hand found her folds and he spread them apart, she was already wet for him and his cock twitched in his pants.

He needed to taste her. His tongue darted forwards and flicked across her exposed clit, she trembled. His tongue was slow to lick the length of her slit and it was torturously good. She moaned and felt the urge to buck.

His hands went to her hips as his tongue delved deep inside. He licked and sucked making Penelope moan and whimper.

Her hands landed on his shoulders to keep herself steadied.

He began to fuck her with his tongue, her moans getting louder and louder, his hands moved from her hips to her bottom. Each hand encircling a globe he pulled her closer to him, his tongue going deeper.

Then his tongue was black on her clit, licking it with enthusiasm, he sucked it into his mouth.

"Oh Aaron!" Penelope shouted, close to orgasm.

Hotch knew she was close and sucked harder on her clit.

Penelope's fingernails dug into his shoulders as she felt the tension building up within her. "Uh Aaron…I uh…yesss…"

Penelope's whole body shuddered with one last lick of Hotch's tongue she came.

Hotch greedily lapped up her juices as Penelope's whole body went limp against the wall. His arms steadied her as he stood up. They looped around her waist and pulled her towards him. He kissed her lips softly before pulling away and leading her to his bedroom.

Hotch helped her onto the bed and watched her as she scooted back to lie in the middle.

He toed off his shoes and unbuckled his belt. Undoing his trousers he pushed them to the floor, his briefs following soon after.

He couldn't wait any longer; his cock was throbbing with need. He crawled onto the bed and over to Penelope. She had a wide-eyed look on her face. "What?" he asked in concern.

"You're…" Penelope blushed and didn't continue.

He frowned "I'm what?" he asked.

"You're…huge," she said the last part quietly and her face got redder.

Hotch couldn't help his lips from twitching up into a smile.

Penelope began to smile too at the look on his face "What it's true!"

He laughed before leaning in to kiss her "I just appreciate the compliment."

Penelope shook her head, "I'm not even sure if that will fit in me."

"What?" Hotch said in mock seriousness "Are you backing out on me?"

"No, of course not," Penelope said "just…go slow?"

Hotch smiled "We'll take it easy," he said "I promise."

Penelope smiled.

Hotch moved over her and kissed her, his tongue slipping into her mouth, as he got between her legs. He gently nudged her to open her legs a little wider and then slipped a finger into her.

She gasped into his mouth.

He slid a second finger in, happy that she was still wet from earlier, he knew she would be ready to take him soon. He might seem 'huge' to Penelope but he knew he was just a bit bigger than average and knew she would have no problem taking him, which caused him to wonder what type of men Penelope had been with before.

He mentally shook that thought away; he did not want to be thinking of such things at a time like this.

Removing his fingers he kissed Penelope once more then took himself in hand and slowly pushed into her entrance.

Penelope inhaled sharply as he penetrated her but he went slow as he had promised he would and Penelope found that she was able to take him and without any pain. She felt fuller than she ever had but it was a good feeling and her hips thrust up against Hotch's to let him know that she was alright.

He smiled at her "Okay?" he asked.

"God yes," She moaned "fuck me Aaron!"

Hotch moaned at that. He pulled out slowly just to thrust back in.

Penelope moaned and arched up.

Hotch nipped at Penelope's neck before he began a moderate pace. Thrusting in and out of her, his cock twitched as she moaned.

She wrapped her legs around his back.

He grunted, her movement had caused him to sink in deeper. His pace quickened and he leaned down to capture her lips in a scorching kiss.

She moaned and brought her hands up to encircle his torso. Her breasts pressing hard against his chest she arched up "Oh Aaron," she moaned "yes…oh uh harder Aaron…"

Hotch was happy to comply. He thrust harder, his balls practically slapping against her ass.

Her nails dung into his back slightly as her orgasm hit and she screamed out in pleasure.

Hotch continued to pound in and out through her orgasm as he himself felt the tingling of his own climax begin to build.

With one last thrust he came. Panting he pulled out and collapsed beside her. They were both exhausted.

Hotch placed a gentle kiss on her forehead and wrapped an arm around her as they both fell asleep.


End file.
